There’s something in human nature that wants people to stalk us, as long as we know they’re stalking us. I can only assume this because phishing schemes pre-dating MySpace and continuing today on Facebook and Twitter continue to spawn by offering you the chance to “See who viewed your profile!”
Well, one major social network really DOES show you who viewed your profile, LinkedIn.
If the viewer is connected within three degrees of you, or if you have a premium account (moneybags), LinkedIn shows you their name and links you to their profile. Otherwise it gives you some perverse guessing game where it tells you that one of the below ten people who all work in the same industry at the same career level in the same city viewed your profile. Can you guess who?!
Can you guess who, it’s a mystery.
Does your person wear a hat? No. You’re history! But I’m still here!
Can you guess who?
Does your person have a beard? Uh-huh. You’re out of here.
Can you guess who, do you have a clue?
Does your person wear glasses? Yes. I’m gone! Me too!
Can you guess who? Not you or you. You’re Sam! You win! LET’S PLAY AGAIN!
Guess Who: Gamecards do not actually talk.
(was that disclaimer really needed? haha)
I never play the guessing game. Mostly because I don’t want to click on someone’s profile to try to ascertain if they would have had a reason to be on my profile, because then THEY can see I was on THEIR profile, and they’ll have to wonder, for the rest of their lives, what the redhead wanted, and why she didn’t have the decency to say “hello!”
But for the people who I can identify, I often click over to their profile. And then judge them. Because in my head (see: this) they judged me first. I mean, they searched LinkedIn, found me, and I was what they thought they wanted, but when they finished reading my profile… they left silently and never gave me a second thought.
We never even had a chance.